WRITER

Slide

There’s a certain level of nihilism that a writer must achieve to be any good at the craft. I’ve reached that level of nihilism so hopefully my writing improves soon.

Slide

I was a strategist for a semester. Now I’m in my eighth trimester as a copywriter. The babies take forever to come out, but when they do, at least I get to name them.

Student Awards

Addy’s

1x Gold National

1x Best In Show

1x Judge’s Pick

1x Silver

Clio Muse

1x Gold

Graphis

2x Gold

1x Silver

D&AD

1x Wood Pencil

    One Club

    1x Gold

    1x Silver

    1x Bronze

    9x Shortlists

  • 11:42
    on a Monday night.
  • Seasick
    ‘i have a question,’ was the text I received holding two-seven off suit.
  • Close Enough
    I parked my car two blocks away from heaven.
  • Push
    Part of me wishes that when I beat the drum it beats me back.
  • Lullaby
    It’s time to make another bad decision.
  • Lost
    Somewhere between Hialeah and Hell.
  • Lightning
    What are the odds that it might strike me?
  • Little Bird
    You sacrifice flight but the sky comes along.
  • Tears
    When an angel cries, I don’t.
  • Ladybug
    Is the dark a reason to run or explore?
  • Hallways
    My once great stride has now become a crawl.
  • Flowers.
    I’m wasted on poor company.
  • Bookstore
    It’s 9am somewhere.
  • Shells
    The only proof that I have lived at all.
  • Numbers
    My life is being reduced to paychecks, rent, 22% auto gratuity.
  • Endlessly
    Here comes the wine.
  • Bottomless
    As if Eve pulled an orange off the tree.
  • Sunburn
    Let’s lower the exposure on life. 
  • My Cat Knew Better
    I didn’t see how bad she was for me. But my cat did.
  • Wet January
    Why is booze the first to go?
  • The Balloon Paradox
    Inflation is good for balloons and bad for happiness.
  • The Bad Mornings Club
    We don’t discriminate between texts, calls, or in-person greetings. We’re bad at all of them.
  • Weight Limit
    It cost me over $100 to bring the suitcase overseas.
  • Limping
    I half-assed a minor in philosophy. Why? My parents strongly advised me against it.
  • Small Talk
    I’m older, wiser, drunker, dumber.
  • Chivalry is Dead
    And buried by every split check.
  • The Storm
    I’m just a beat-to-shit ship in the storm (hopefully the ship has devil horns).
  • A Victim of Circumstance
    Maybe I should open up my blinds and let some sunlight in. I wouldn’t sparkle, but I would get a fair tan.
  • S
    You were once the girl of my dreams, but I haven’t been sleeping well. 

“The only thing that makes you a writer is gluing your ass in a seat. Everything else is a pose”

– Hank Moody, alcoholic & fictional father

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